rainy wednesday evening

Tonight I am watching the rain fall while listening to Sigur Ros and feeling wonderfully in-tuned with my life. Interesting because if you ask anyone who interacted with me yesterday, I was most definitely not in this heavenly state-of-mind. (Sorry Chris. Sorry Miss. Sorry Momma).

And tonight I am thinking about dreams, because I have been dreaming again lately. Not future dreaming kind of dreaming. Yeah, heck I do that everyday, but I mean nightlife dreaming. Dreaming in between the bed sheets, in between the place where my head hits my pillow and my canopy's protecting ambivalence. Those kind of dreams. And those are the hardest because those are the dreams you can't control.

Those dreams can take you places. Far away places. Places of your past, the life you used to live, the regrets, the memories you wish you could rewind and replay and relive over and over. Like the dreams of my Nana that so often frequent my mind these days. Or the dreams of my mother as a twenty-something, or others not for mentioning. And others. Others. Others.

Sometimes I wish I could control my dreams, keep them tamed on a leash, only to be viewed at my discretion. But sometimes, and I really mean sometimes with this, I enjoy getting kicked in the face every now and then with the past and the reality of the truth and the beauty of the woman God has made me today, and how beautiful it is to see his gradual change in my life day by day so that by the time I am gray-haired and wonderfully wrinkly I might just then feel ready for the promise of eternity with my Favorite, my Lord, my Creator, my Maker, my Faithful One.

And so tonight, I move on past my dreams and only hope that the ones that fill my head this night are lovely.

Here are few photographs from this red, white, and blue weekend:

our yummy snacks

an wizardry attempt for the USA: Marissa, Kayla, Rebecca, and Sharon

and our crazy home fireworks display

1 comment:

Anonymous said...

I think your U in USA might have forgotten to light her Sparkler!

Here's an interesting read on Lucid Dreaming (Being in Control of your dreams)


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